What is a hater’s motivation?

Dear Haters,

What is your motivation? Now you don’t actually bring me down, I just find you mildly annoying…but I seriously want to know what your motivation is. Are you bitter? Jaded? Wish you were in a better position? Please tell me so I can work with you to help you become who you think you ought to be. Normally, I (not so secretly) like to mock people who say they have haters because I think “why would anyone want to be like you?” You know those people who look a hot mess and a half (think big girl in a baby tee–which by the way I’ve been seeing a little too frequently in my new city), and when someone tells them their attire is not flattering, they say “I know I look good, stop hating!” This is not one of those occasions. This is about those haters who try to make your accomplishments and general good fortune seem minimal and insignificant.

I have an associate (I don’t use the term friend for everyone) and she’s nice but she will try to find the bad in whatever good news you tell her. Initially, I thought I was being one of those annoying people who tend to just talk about themselves and brag all the time. But I’m not. (Sidenote: I feel kind of weird writing that because I do have this blog where I can write whatever I please and potentially brag about myself all the time, but I don’t. When’s the last time I bragged in a post?! Huh?) She legitimately will try to find the microscopic ant in your soup, and lie about there being one when she can’t physically find it. And frankly I’m running out of rationales for her behavior and why I should keep her in my life.

I look at her and realize how unhappy she is with her own life and I think she can’t help but be negative because she’s so unhappy. And people do always say, “misery loves company.” I have to tell myself that’s the main reason she tries to bring negativity into my life because if it isn’t and she’s intentionally being spiteful in an attempt to hurt me, it’s quite foolish of me to continue associating with her. I keep hoping and trying to think of ways to help her be more content with her life, but at the end of the day happiness comes from within.


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This work by bellereveur.com is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.


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